"If I am so good then why?" - a story of regrets

I had someone email and ask "If I'm so good then why did I..." I could feel the pain and regret pouring out of the letter. My heart went out to this person - this otherwise wonderful person who, for a moment, fell from grace. Why is that people equate their worth with their actions? I was reminded of my past and the things that I wish I had done differently. That's true for everyone. As long as your human and your feet are made of clay, your going to make mistakes. Some of us more than others. It's part of being human. In this form we are neither angels or devils, but something inbetween; something pitiful and beautiful that struggles with light and dark. Right and wrong. And on those occasions when we choose the wrong way, it doesn't mean we are less valuable or loveable. The thing I would like anyone reading this to hear is that we change. The fact that someone can feel regret means that they have changed. They are no longer that person that made that choice. None of us are who we used to be and today we are not the people we will be tomorrow. It's ok to forgive yourself and embrace that darker side of you. The side that fears, that doesn't think straight, the side that fumbles as it lies in darkness and ignorance. And if you can't embrace it, I would hope you could at least accept it. There is a quote thats says,"Embrace the animal or the beast will rage." I think when we embrace it we make room for the light to come in and heal the rage. We either move forward in the light and love or backward into darkness. Our movement comes through our choices and thank God/dess for choices because we have lots have them. They can be our stepping stones or our pitfalls but, they are not what makes us worthy of love. Today, if you will, forgive yourself if there is something you regret. Own up to it, take responsibility and acknowledge it to anyone you may have wronged. Hope for their forgiveness, but don't insist on it. Sometimes forgiveness takes time. Know you don't have to have someone's forgiveness to move forward. Be grateful if you feel regret. It let's you know your not that person anymore. But don't let regret rule your life. It, like all emotions, has it's place. And last but not least, learn from it and make a commitment to be a better human being. This is my limited understanding and my truth.